Sunday, May 11, 2014

The E.T. Highway, and Where I Used to Work That Wasn’t There

Years ago in my Air Force days, we lived in Las Vegas where I commuted each week to my workplace.  Which can’t be named, can’t be talked about, and didn’t exist.  It was a difficult time – I’d come home after four or five days and Brenda would ask “So, what did you do all week?”, to which I’d reply “can’t tell you”.  Not the best way to start the weekend!
And so after all these years, I was able to take my bride to a place that’s the closest in distance and farthest from reality to where I worked.  And it all starts with a trip down the Extraterrestrial Highway…..
Heading north out of Las Vegas on Highway 93, we drove for a couple of hours Extraterrestrial Highwayuntil passing the little town of Alamo, then turned west on highway 375, which if it isn’t the loneliest highway in the state, is (pardon the expression) damn near.  Known as the Extraterrestrial Highway for its Area 51 Signproximity to the place that (ahem) doesn’t exist, it doesn’t take long before you run into enterprising establishments, like the Alien Research Center, complete with a lifelike alien guarding the entrance to it’s multi-dollar building..

Area 51 Store
Across the road is another place where you can “drop your toxic waste” and buy beef jerky, apparently from cows beamed up by flying saucers – makes your mouth water, doesn’t it?Jerky Sign
From this mecca of shopping, it was 40 miles of driving through an area where even the jackrabbits carry canteens until we entered the outskirts of our destination, Rachel, where those who believe in alien spacecraft and captured alien space technology come to watch the skies over Area 51, have a beer and share conspiracy theories.
Rachel Sign
Not much farther down the road, in a area of run down mobile homes, abandoned cars, and dead trees, was our destination, the famous Little A’Le’Inn, where you can chow down on an Alien Burger, buy alien Christmas tree ornaments, and schedule a tour of Area 51 that place….well, at least to the big warning signs and armed guards with mirrored sunglasses.Little A Le Inn  Check their web site (linked above), if you’d like to rent a room ($45) or an RV site ($15).  They advertise that you can walk in, drive in or fly in, and they must expect fly-ins judging by this sign:
Self Parking Sign
They even offer a tow service if your vehicle breaks down….any type of vehicle:
Alien Tow Truck
We’d have like to stay a while, but it was late in the day and we had a long drive home.  So we headed back, and on the way I pointed out to Brenda a peak known as Bald Mountain, and where I worked might be on the other side.  If it existed, that is.Bald Mountain
Although it’s a desolate, dry, and forbidding area, every once in a while we’d come across a place that almost made us forget how miserable the area was.  So I’ll leave you with this image:
Joshua Tree
I’d tell you more about where I worked, but on my last day two guys in black suits and sunglasses showed up, held up a little boxy thing…..and the last thing I remember is a flashing blue light…..
Rachel is an interesting place, lightly populated but with intriguing people.  So if you’re ever in the area, make a trip, buy a green alien ornament, have a burger, and remember……the truth is out there!
We’re still traveling, stay tuned!